Dilemma. That story I published has now been accepted at another magazine. I had emailed them when Blood Orange accepted it, said it was now off the market but I would love to replace it in this round of submissions, I don’t know if I sent it to the wrong address or what, maybe I was supposed to go to the submission manager and pull the original story, I thought I was acting according to protocol, whatever.

I was very proud of Blood Orange as my first host, I am still, but Arcadia prints. That was the goal for this first major submission push, to hold a magazine and see my name in the content table and flip to my page,mypage, and there she be, my story, smiling back at me. And in all likelihood that’s not going to happen now. I guess this isn’t a dilemma because what’s to be done about it, and what would I change if I could, back in time, nothing.

Bret Anthony Johnston promised me exactly this would almost never happen, and if it did it would not be a problem. It feels like a problem.

Okay. Okay I’m over it. Idaho Review rejected me the day before Arcadia did not, and that story I still think should have been my first acceptance, it was my most worthy, so I’ll send them that one if they ask for it, and if they don’t ask for it and just choose to hate me, well. I guess that’s another thing that could happen.

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